Qalqalah Sugra

what can i do? what fun can i do more? what else? damn i'm out of ideas i ran out of ideas my mood is ruined i wanna say that i am mad at everyone that why does my heart doesn't feel that tranquility it's only a small realief a sigh of relief what am i looking for for real? really, why am i like his i wonder i am so tired of the image and all these masks neither the masks that i use to show to other people it's tiring and intriguing

I want to cut off everything again and again I want to stop everything  from moving without my consent I somehow felt like being controlled lured into something evil I realized that many good things happened also And there also stuffs getting real good but I cant lie, I cant deny, there is that deep in my heart i can feel it, i can sense that something's wrong, not supposed to be but maybe not tonite

 When I feel like I'm falling into despair and numbness That's when I realized everything just went by like a thin air it just happened it just passed by me it just laughed for a while Maybe I am trying to fool myself All these times Maybe I am just a fool myself All these months keep on playing the same tune never get bored stop for a while yet go through same thing again and again yeah, I am lazy to even try I don't understand or I dont want to try to I don't want to do the job I just wanna see from afar How far can I go Can I go far? Or stop just like that?